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       DAVE'S 
        DIARY - 27 DECEMBER 2003 - FRED NEGRO 
      FRED 
        NEGRO - MASTER OF DARK HUMOUR 
      
         
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          The 
            first time ribald singing satirist Fred Negro fought the law he won 
            - with a little help from a bemused Prahran magistrate. 
             
            It was 1986 and Fred was fronting one of his many bands I Spit 
            On Your Gravy whose alter ego The Gravy Billies were later 
            banned from Tamworth. 
             
            The Richmond born, Collingwood supporter singer's record retailers 
            were busted by the Vice Squad over the band's debut vinyl disc, St 
            Kilda's Alright. 
             
            The gendarmes received complaints about the disc's lyrics and lyric 
            sheet they seized in a raid on Greville Records in Prahran and a St 
            Kilda store in June, 1985. 
             
            Magistrate Graeme Golden - a connoisseur of fine arts - was handed 
            the case in the then modern Prahran courthouse. 
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      The now defunct 
        courthouse may have been modern but His Worship noted that none of the 
        courtrooms were fitted with musical accoutrements such as a record player. 
         
        Magistrate Golden, wishing to give the retailers the full benefit of his 
        musical and legal knowledge, requested the Vice Squad or prosecutor oblige 
        with such an accessory. 
        There was a deafening silence - perhaps an omen for the outcome.  
         
        I suggested to the cops they borrow one from lost property at the adjacent 
        police station. 
       GOLDEN 
        DAYS RADIO 
      Such daytime 
        concerts were light relief for long suffering court reporters who spent 
        most of their days writing about and ducking and weaving wealth belt snobs, 
        crims, celebrities, sport, TV, radio and rock stars and other flotsam 
        and jetsam. 
         
        The prosecution subsequently located a stereophonic unit with minimal 
        hiss and the show began with all the flourish of John McMahon's Radio 
        Auditions on 3UZ. 
         
        Gregarious Golden dropped the needle on the Gravy and treated an ever-growing 
        cast to selected tracks from the distinctly Australian album in a welcome 
        sense of fair play. 
         
        I don't recall the name of any of the long forgotten tunes but have a 
        vivid impression that none featured pedal steel, fiddle or banjo. 
         
        Golden, a man of diverse taste and humour, ruled the lads disc might offend 
        some but it was not obscene. 
         
        "Anyone possessed of a reasonable intelligence would not buy it," 
        Golden declared for the benefit of the Press. 
         
        "If I said it was obscene it would probably increase sales and I 
        don't want to do that."  
        His Worship said that most of the $9 retail price wasn't spent on the 
        music. 
        "I imagine most of the $9 went into packaging."  
         
        So the charges were dismissed and Negro went away to find other means 
        of increasing his infamy. 
       GRAVY 
        BILLIES BANNED FROM TAMWORTH  
      Negro's many 
        bands included the Editions, Brady Bunch Lawn Mower Massacre, The Band 
        Who Shot Liberty Valance and Fuck, Fucks but none went to Tamworth 
        in January of 1986. 
         
        So it was left to the Gravy Billies who joined an old style package 
        show with the late A P Johnson and the Dead Livers at Tamworth 
        Workmen's Club at the 14th annual festival. 
        But there lay the problem. 
         
        The Dead Livers, under the tutelage of St Kilda promoter and expatriate 
        Kiwi guitarist Tex Nobody, was the only one of those three acts booked 
        at Tamworth Workmen's Club. 
        Johnson and Negro's lads merely stepped into the bawdy breech as a public 
        service when Sydney band Shotgun failed to front for their support role. 
         
        The Gravy Billies were gonged after performing such crowd pleasers 
        as The Ballad Of Rockabilly Hudson & Gomer Pyle, We Ate 
        The World, Dim Sim Head, The Monster Grows, Football Mouth and Let's 
        Buy A Pizza. 
       A 
        P JOHNSON AND PAPAL BIOGRAPHER JAMES ORAM  
      So was Johnson 
        when he serenaded a NSW Vice Squad sergeant, celebrating his 30th birthday, 
        with a selection of David Allan Coe country porn classics from his Nothing 
        Sacred and Underground albums. 
         
        The birthday party, including Papal biographer - the late James Oram - 
        was also treated to Johnson performing his original Tamworth RIP. 
         
        So the "support" acts were fired and the Dead Livers lived to 
        play another day. 
         
        This was not suffice strife for Gravy Billies, buoyed by possibilities 
        of pending publicity in Australasian Post, Truth, Sunday Press, People, 
        Juke and The Age. 
         
        "We've been kicked out of better joints than this," Negro said 
        before launching plan-B. 
        The lads ventured into other venues and conducted a unique talent quest 
        - their Nipple Print Hall Of Fame. 
         
        Not a huge success but a feat appealing to the large press contingent 
        jaded by the P R trotted out by festival organisers.  
         
        But that was then and this is now. 
         
        Johnson's CD Greatest Hits & Ex Misses was the first release 
        on the Nu Country record label. 
         
        CLICK HERE to read how you can buy 
        a copy. 
         
        And Negro's new roots country band Shonky Tonk is now mainstream as the 
        acts it once parodied. 
       OLD 
        A P TUNES GUITARS  
         
        Singing Texan crime novelist Kinky Friedman booked Johnson as his support 
        act for the final night of a three-date season at now defunct ID's in 
        Prahran on his debut Australian tour at Easter of 1990. 
         
        The Kinkster, unimpressed by the booker's choice of Dave Graney for the 
        first two gigs, spotted A P lurking in the shadows at the venue. 
         
        Kinky called Johnson up on stage to tune his guitar during the second 
        show - sadly old A P de-tuned it so badly that hot shot guitarist Mick 
        Hamilton earned a cameo repairing the damage. 
         
        This earned Johnson - not Mick - the support on the third gig. 
         
        It was a novel way of choosing a support act but a trend continued on 
        future tours when the artist was not happy with local supports chosen 
        by the promoter or booker. 
       NEGRO 
        ADOPTED BY TEXAN CRIME NOVELIST 
      Negro formed 
        Shonky Tonk with a bunch of desperadoes in 1993 and didn't have to wait 
        long to win the support for a tour by Waylon, Willie and Billy Joe Shaver 
        in 1994. 
         
        The band played in the foyer of the Rod Laver Arena as the entree act 
        and guitarist Dave Moll wrote the tune Billy, Willie & Waylon 
        about their life changing experience. 
         
        Shonky Tonk landed the gig with the help of Musicians Union officer Paul 
        Gruyters who needed an Australian support. 
         
        They also landed a gig on the second Kinky Friedman tour from Gruyters 
        successor - the late Andrew Laverty, also a big supporter of Nu Country. 
         
         
        So by the time Kinky returned for tours in 2000 and 2002 the lads were 
        there by popular request from artist and promoter alike at Melbourne shows. 
         
        Shonky Tonk backed Kinky and Little Jewford at the famed Esplanade Hotel, 
        St Kilda, on Saturday August 26, 2000 at an huge benefit after our Beer 
        Can Hill studios burned down on June 26. 
         
        The show saved the bacon of the radio station, later resurrected at the 
        Paris, Texas, end of Collins St in 2001 and now branching out into TV 
        as well as live shows. 
       BILLY 
        JOE, WILLIE & WAYLON 
         
        Billy, Willie & Waylon is one of many highlights of the band's 1998 
        debut CD, I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. 
         
        The album also featured Peter Lillie tune I Wanna Sing A Johnny Cash 
        Song - the writer also recorded it but not on his Poetry & 
        Western disc. 
         
        Shonky Tonk also recorded other originals including Lillie's Brand 
        New Appliance, the Negro-Moll collaborations Miss My Mind, Something 
        More Comfy, Girl From APRA (with Jason Evans who also co-wrote I 
        Hate Collingwood.) 
         
        Negro adapted Old Pubs from a Peter Gow poem, penned The Song 
        Radio Would Flog with and Moll penned the self deprecatory Big 
        Time about his ambitions. 
         
        The band also covered the late Roger Miller's This Town, Roger 
        Ferris's George Jones hit Yabba Dabba Do and Johnathan Richman's 
        Horsies. 
         
        And don't forget their finale cut of Hank Williams Jr hit All My Rowdy 
        Friends Are Coming Over Tonight - the killer song after which Fred 
        named his son. 
       NEGRO 
        DINGO LOGO AU GO-GO  
         
        That's real country and so is Negro who designed the Nu Country dingo 
        logos that have adorned our tee shirts, caps, windcheaters and other merchandise. 
         
        Negro generously donated his talents over a decade to our multi media 
        missile that is still aimed high and wide. 
         
        One of his many dingoes was animated for the first 13 episode series of 
        our TV show and others are roaming the unlucky radio country. 
         
        Shonky Tonk performs live from the Jackson St festival in St Kilda on 
        Nu Country TV - Saturday December 27 - and when it's repeated in 2004. 
         
        If that doesn't sate your taste - the band has a full book of gigs over 
        summer.  
         
        Check out Fred's Pub Strip in InPress magazine and his Esplanade and Greyhound 
        Hotel cartoon ads in Beat and InPress for full details. 
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